I had a Bill Lane Moment today.
Like the rhythmic ebb and flow of the surf, I delighted in the waves that overcame me at this particular moment – waves of seemingly incompatible emotions, starting with the profound joy and gratitude for having been Bill’s friend, yet pierced by a mix of nostalgia and sadness that he’s been gone for over two years. My mind drifted to a familiar scene. I saw dozens of people gathered near “the” couch in a conference hotel lobby – a couch, however, with a noticeably empty seat. But there seemed to be a lingering energy of kindness and connection that people craved, emanating from that space – like it wasn’t empty at all. In wonderful ways, the Bill Lane legacy of lives on.
This Bill Lane Moment was undoubtedly sparked by the recent Bill Lane Hospitality Award presentation. One of the truly special honors in this field, this “Golden Couch Award” recognizes someone who embodies the essence of what Bill was all about – connection, kindness, and seeing the good in others. The inaugural recipient of this award was, fittingly, my good friend Dana Cox. The fact that Bill and Dana – direct business competitors – were such good friends is the very essence of this recognition!
This year, we congratulate Johnny Tock as the 2nd recipient of the Bill Lane Hospitality Award. Johnny essentially spent the entire pandemic connecting with others, and sharing the goodness of these people with the world. This creative, simple, raw, widespread effort truly helped foster connection in a time of imposed isolation. Congratulations, Johnny! And thank you to Carol Lane, Kathy Lane Kemp, and the rest of the Lane family, as well as all the sponsors of this award that keeps the “spirit of the couch” alive.
The beautiful thing is that there are countless flavors of Bill Lane Moments and they’re all awesome! They can show up in myriad ways, manifesting in stunning significance. Most of these moments will likely have something to do with seeing people at their best, and then letting them know it. They may take the form of one person making sure another person is noticed, appreciated, valued, connected. Bill Lane Moments are a smile, a shout-out from across the lobby, or any other act of kindness, reminding the “target” that he, she, or they is amazing.
Sometimes, a Bill Lane Moment bubbles up to prompt you to buy a cup of “cawfee” to whoever is next to you in line at Starbucks. Just to spark a smile and make someone’s day.
Other times, a Bill Lane Moment might just bring a tear to your eye and a lump in your throat, while simultaneously landing a smile on your face. That’s the kind of Bill Lane Moment I had today.
And I loved it.
Bill was my friend. I don’t consider myself special because of that fact – just lucky. Bill was everybody’s friend, and everybody was his, which is the key characteristic that made him so special.
One of our operating principles at STRīV is “Be Like Bill.” Adopting this principle is a way to honor Bill, but more importantly, it’s a way to honor humanity, and the individuals around us, just as Bill would do. It’s a reminder to reach out to those in need; to extend a hand of friendship. To remind people of their inherent awesomeness. We don’t pretend that Bill was perfect – none of us is, right? But he did have an impact, and for me, it was profound. In fact, one of our psychoeducational groups designed to help our young adults navigate the social landscape is called, “Be Like Bill: The Art of Social Connection.”
See, this is the beautiful thing about a Bill Lane Moment: it starts with a nostalgic smile, accompanied by a twinge of sadness, and followed by a flood of memories. And not only memories of Bill, but the memories and interactions of so many others! A Bill Lane Moment creates a ripple effect that unleashes a flood of “feel goods” and reminders to reach out to make someone’s day.
Whether you knew Bill or not, I hope you have a Bill Lane Moment today. Life is better when we do.
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